New Year

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I know for a lot of people 2016 was a hard year, even looking at the news we were surrounded by tragedy there was the Flint Michigan water crisis, (which is still going on) the Zika outbreak which caused Olympians to not compete in the games, the Ecuadorian earthquake and lets not forget Donald Trump trumpbecoming President Elect.

For me this year was awesome! It was officially the first year in 8 that I was not married (I was separated at the end of 2014, and the divorce was not final until 3/2015) and also the year that I would say goodbye to single life!!!

I know that I will look at these years and I will always look fondly at them, it was at this time that I realized just how much I can do. I saw that I am so much more than a wife and mom, I am a woman that has goals, and that has fought through adversity and won. I returned to school and got a new job that will help give me experience that will be vital once my degree is obtained.

I became comfortable with being a 20 something that was divorced and has 2 kids. A funny story with this actually had to do with my high school reunion. I was talking to a classmate and showed her a picture of the girls Aaron was with me, and after she had looked at the pictures, she gave me a concerned expression and said: ” I see you in them but no offense I do not see you (pointing at Aaron) at all.” You can imagine what our reaction was we both looked at each other and laughed! Then I replied “well that’s a good thing cause their not his! I have been married, had kids and divorced in 10 years, what have you been up to?”

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This has been a remarkable year, right now on my tree I have an ornament that is of three snowmen on a sleigh. I got this once my ex left, and it has three names, Mommy, Faith, and Becky. I will never get rid of this, and I am sure it will always hang on my tree, but next year I look forward to hanging another one (maybe right beside it) that has 4 (or maybe 5 😉 ) names on it. 🙂

 

Happy New year I hope your 2017 is extraordinary!!!!!

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Finding love

About 2 years ago my life was just being put back together, I was coming out of the darkness that my divorce caused. By the end of January of that year I was healed and ready to move on. Now, this did not mean I was ready to date, but it did mean I was ready to live my life, so one weekend when my children were with their dad, I called up an old friend. Now calling this person a friend is using the term loosely, the connection is hard but give me a minute to explain this…

Okay so this person is Aaron

My ex-mother-in-law was in her 4th marriage when I got married, she married a man named Dale and Dale has triplets that are my age and a younger child (who I think is 5 years younger) so for a time Dale’s children were my step siblings in-laws.

When I was pregnant with Faith, Dale’s daughter (one of the triplets) began dating Aaron. I actually met him for the first time when I was 36 weeks expecting!

They dated for about 4 years and broke up when Becky was around 1, in this time we would talk and were friendly but nothing more (we were both in love and in committed

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Faith playing with Uncle Aaron

relationships) Faith actually called him Uncle Aaron!

 

Fast forward 2 years and I was at a gas station filling up when I saw someone I recognized at another pump, it was Aaron. Now, my looks had changed since he had last seen me, the baby weight was gone and really he only knew me when I was either pregnant or postpartum. I was excited to see him after so long so I went over and he didn’t even recognize me! We talked and I invited him to dinner so we all (myself, my ex-husband and himself) could catch up. This dinner never happened and in retrospect, it’s probably a good thing 😉 .

Now fast forward another 2 years I knew he was living in the area and really I just wanted to go out one night. I called him to see if he was available and we talked for 2 hours and decided to meet that weekend for “a girls night out”. Well, to say the least, that night did not turn out to be a girls night out it was in fact, our first date. From there, our relationship slowly grew (of course we began dating right before my ex-husband took his 1st month long hiatus) so we had to take things slow. The beginning was hard and I relied on family and friends to watch the girls for me so we could see each other, and in this first month, I think we saw each other a whopping 3 times!!

But regardless of the time, we spent together our relationship continued to grow and then the weekend of Mother’s day 2015 he met the girls for the first time!

Since that point, things have just gone up and this past September he proposed and I said yes!!

The wedding is scheduled for June and we are all so happy, the girls love him and so do I. I am thankful that he is in our life and am looking forward to spending the rest of my life with him.

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Getting a little bit Stronger

Okay so in short this whole process is a roller coaster ride! Well actually more like the Tower of Terror with a nice rise and a dramatic drop, today was an awesome day!! I woke up and was happy as the day went on I did get a little discouraged because I found out the job I have been offered would require me to work a 4 pm to 8 pm shift which means I would only see Faith before school. I was not happy about this, so I went out and applied for some more jobs. Now on my way to fill out an application somewhere I drove past a floral shop that actually had a sign out front “Now hiring part time Floral Designer” Okay, for me this is exactly what I was looking for and I had an extra resume on hand!!!

So after I applied for the original job I stopped by the floral shop, now in a few months I will be moving and this shop is literally 2 minutes from my new house. I went in and the owner wasn’t there but I talked to the lead florist, gave him my resume and he told me to call tomorrow to follow up. Now I am nervous because I do have experience in floral design but not as much as some other people, I am damn good at making arrangements and I think if I can land an interview that I can get the job.  Here are some examples of my work:

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I would love to get a job that I can put my children to bed at night, it is a hard transition going from a stay at home mom of 6 years to a working mom and student. I am also venturing outside of Floral Design (because there are so few jobs available) and am trying to get into a bank teller position. The hours for this are better and the pay is decent, it will be more of a drive but at this point I could care less!

Once I got down from the high of applying for 3 really good jobs I had to deal with the fact that I am still alone. Now I know today that even if my ex was to tell me he wanted to work it out I would say no. In just the last 6 weeks I have turned into a women that I never knew existed, so when I say I am lonely I just mean that I miss having a connection with someone. When I come home at night it is just me and the girls and there is no one to talk about my day. I wish I could come home and tell someone how awesome of a day I had! I know in time this will get better, I am in a adjustment period and lets face it I have very little adult interaction in my day to day life. I think once I get a job that will help.

I would not wish divorce on anyone but in my case things are looking up and it feels really good to see that!

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